Tomorrow, the Fourth of July, is my favorite holiday. It is not because I like fireworks (I don't) or because I am patriotic (I'm not). When I think of the Fourth of July I don't think of BBQ's and sparklers. I think of the Declaration of Independence, which is, in my opinion, the single most important writing ever committed to paper. The Declaration of Independence served the purpose of the colonists formally separating ties with England. And as Thomas Jefferson crafted those words he mentions that all people have the right and the duty to cast off government when it becomes despotic. The Fourth of July has become a celebration of the United States, which is ironic, because the United States has become the very thing that we hated in Mother England all those years ago: a despotic government. As Thomas Jefferson listed out the grievances against England, we too could easily list out the ways in which the current empire has raped us. But there is hope. Mr. Jefferson lights the way and informs us that it is our duty to get rid of this parasite. The first step is opening our eyes to what "the state" really is. I am loving that California is bankrupt and issuing I.O.U.'s. My hope is that Californias will realize that the 10% they pay in income taxes and the steep sales taxes are for nothing, that they get no real service for their payments and if there is a shortfall in things like education then they'll be amazed at how quickly the free market comes up with answers to needs. If only the Federal government couldn't print up money out of thin air then they would be bankrupt too and we'd be able to see clearly that the Emporer is naked. My greeting to everyone is not "have a happy Fourth" it is "happy Independence Day." and I don't mean celebrate our independence from England. I mean celebrate your inherant right to show the bums the door.

Just got back from the Bay and had a pretty rough weekend. Man was it hot! Anyway, it is nice to see Howie posted his artwork again. I still want a "Double Barrell" painting but I guess I will have to wait.

Well, tonight I am going to meet the former First Lady Nancy Reagan. We are going to kick it in DC old school. What I really wanted to do is find a 45 RPM I thought I had by the Blue Riddim Band entitled, "Nancy Reagan," which hailed up the First Lady. As you recall, Blue Riddim was the first all-white band to play the Reggae Sunsplash in Jamaica, back in the 80s. I was going to try to get her to sign the reggae single which might have been interesting, but I couldn't find it. Oh well.

Wheel out!

The Dow will drop down to 7,200 in July 2009. The Dow will then surge up to 9,600 by Mid August/September 2009.

After dipping 600+ points (8,900) in late October/early November the Dow will then surge up to 10,800 by Christmas 2009.

The Dow will then drop to 8,200 in April of 2010, after which it will rise back up to 10,800 by August 2010.

After that the Dow will turn sharply lower, eventually arriving at the 4,000 level.

CrazyChuck spotted at Bay to Breakers?

Some new Howie art: http://lowbar.com/howie

I smell like a zoo
I smell like a zoo
I'm basically a monkey
and I smell like a zoo

As readers of Lowbar know, I've been prognosticating a major downturn in the economy for years now. And as events have unfolded since September even I have been shocked by just how bad it has gotten. No doubt as our leaders in Washington try to stop the hemorrhaging the markets will buck up and down. But I feel that this time it truly is different. I think that we've gone past the event horizon and are being sucked inevitably into the black hole of insolvency. As this happens confidence, sentiment and statistics will gives us the proverbial writing on the wall. However I find that the media is often reluctant to print this news. Maybe they realize they won't sell as many whatever it is they sell if they are too pessimistic. These stories glare out at me like headlights on a dark, lonely mountain road. So I will take it upon myself to start sharing these lights in the dark and I'll be adding some comments as to why I find them illuminating.

I recommend doing two shots of tequila and playing the following really loudly on a good stereo:

• Like the Mormons Do
• I Do Not Hope
• SFPD
  

These are revised BulletVibe songs which have a lead guitar part added.

I requested from the bank the actual letter that the State of California had sent to them ordering the seizure of my property. The bank kept insisting that it was a court order. They told me this three times even though all of the people from the levy department had not actually seen the court order. They told me that they always get court orders. They also agreed with me that if what was in their possession was not a court order then the seizure would not be lawful and that I should get my money back. I knew it wasn't a court order because the guy who wrote the letter, a low life scum who is just an employee of the state and nothing more, admitted to me that it was not a court order. So I was not surprised (relieved a little though) that what I got in the mail from Bank of America was not legal in any way. There is no court order. What the letter was was a "request" from this employee and the only thing official about it was that it was on State of California letterhead. I called the levy department at the bank again and told them that what they had in their possession was not a court order. This time I got someone on the line who actually threw off the facade that the letter was a legal document. "You're right" he said, "It's not a court order but if you read your depositor's statement, which you agreed to when you opened an account, it clearly states that we can seize your funds." I told him that I had read my depositor's agreement and I know what it says but that it didn't make what they had done legal: to take my property without due process and without a court order. Seeing that my efforts to get my money back through this bank representative were pointless, I mentioned that they might want to stop telling their customers, who suffer a similar fate, that they have court orders because that's a lie, they rarely, if ever, do.

So what's next? Well I've petitioned the Tax Board, through their only venue for grievances about my tax return but I've been told that will take another two months. I'm confident that the balance due in question will be resolved and that ultimately I will get the money back. Both the bank and the State have me over a barrel and there isn't much I can do as long as they both are operating outside of the law.

At the risk of opening up myself to scorn and ridicule (what else is new) I've decided to chronicle my dealings with the California Franchise Tax Board and Bank of America because it is an interesting story and might come in handy to some poor soul who will have to deal with them in the future. This will be an ongoing report. I'll start in the middle, flashback to the past and reveal the latest developments as they occur.

Last Wednesday I went to use my Bank of America debit card to buy food for my family's dinner. The card was declined. I knew I had over $2,000 in my account so something was up. I went home, asked my wife if she'd run up any large bills lately, she hadn't and then, because I've been recently dealing with the California Tax Board I thought they might be the culprit. I scoured my house for any unopened letters from Bank of America or the Tax Board, nothing. I then looked at my online statement and saw that both of my accounts had been depleted of funds of around $2,000 plus a $100 fee that the Bank had tacked on for their inconvenience (can you believe those fuckers?).

I then called the bank to try and get some information. The guy on the line told me it was the FTB (Franchise Tax Board) that took it and that I owed them money (I don't... long story, I'll get there) and it was a "court order". I decided to close both of those accounts, no use keeping them open if they are just going to steal from me out of them also I didn't want to accrue any overdraft fees at $35 a pop for any miscellaneous charges that would continue to hit my account.

The next day I called the number of the Franchise Tax Board and I got "Eric" on the line. I have talked with this guy before, he's a complete tool. I asked him what was going on with my account. He said the Tax Board issued a letter to my bank to resolve my outstanding balance. I asked if that was a court order. He said no. I then asked who issued it. He said he did. I asked if he was an officer with any kind of enforcement authority (called a pocket commission with enforcement). He said no. I then proceeded to call him every name in the book and demanded that I get my money back. He hung up on me. Why would I call him names? Because he had no authority to take my money. He just issued a letter with no court backing it. That is unlawful. Tax collectors must follow procedures for seizing funds including getting what is called a Warrant of Distraint, a court order. A mere "notice" of a levy is not an actual levy and is not a legal document but it is an administrative one only.

"Taxpayers cannot be compelled to convey property to tax collectors absent a court order."
-US Court of Appeals Jan 25, 2005

"Notice of levy is insufficient."
United States vs. O'Dell

"Any person who mistakenly surrenders to the United States property or rights to property not properly subject to levy is not relieved from liability to a third party who owns the property."
26 CFR part 301.63332-1 (c)

So now my beef is with the bank and getting information out of these guys has been like pulling teeth so far. They swear up and down that they got a court order although I can't get anyone on the phone who has actually seen it. They all agree that if there is no court order then I should get my money back. Banks have a fiduciary responsibility to guard my property. If they give it over to someone without a court order they, the bank, can be held responsible and liable for damages. I have requested that the actual letter that the Tax Board sent to the bank be sent to me. So far the only thing I have gotten from the bank is a letter that reads: "On November 17th we received a State of California Franchise Tax Board in the amount of $2000..." Notice anything wrong with that sentence? It's incomplete. You received a what? They don't say because they can't. They just received a god dammed letter from a god dam pencil pusher from the state and that's it.

I know they don't have a court order. Eric would not have admitted it if he did, that used tampon would love to wipe my nose in it. "Well maybe he didn't know of this other court order" the helpful lady at Bank of America guessed. "Or how about all of your "Notices' of Levy are not actually court orders" I said. "You never know." she admitted.

In our next episode: The bank sends me the letter (maybe they'll get around to it, maybe they'll stall) that the Tax Board sent them and lo and behold there is no court order. I then contact the bank to get my money back. The bank stalls some more, can't get anyone on the line, have to fill out a form, etc.). My money is sent to the Tax Board and the bank claims they can't do anything about it. I prepare to sue the bank and get the idiot who attests to receiving a court order when there was none brought up on charges of perjury. And later in my tale I'll tell you how I got myself into this here briar patch.