Tuesday, February 22, 2005

Tragedy in IRAN

Magnitude-6.4 Earthquake Kills 420 in Iran How is this possible? So I guess that's one way to fight the drug problems in our world.

posted by Captain Heinous @ 2/22/2005 10:18:00 AM 0 Comments

NEURO-Linguistic Programming

Actually, unless there are new thoughts in practice (pun), the term NLP refers to Neuro-Linguistic Programming, you drunk foo. Interestingly enough, I think we can come up with our own stigma to achieve the results you mention. By the way, does something that has not been validated, or non-validated, mean the same thing as something invalid?

Let's see, we need to come up with new NLP terms that invoke stigma on the female persuasion, and then test our theories in the field. If we do not get the results we want, we will try new "tools," retest our theories, and find the results. This sounds strangely like what I have done every weekend since I was 15. Oddly enough, though the results were quite satisfactory through my 20's, I found that I had to modify my tools and theories and retest them in my 30's. I am still conducting tests and find that there are also permutations to the theories when alcohol is involved. The drivers for the tools I use in these experiments are linguistic cues, driven or influenced by sudden thoughts, and tested using verbal commands, instructions, or persuasions. I call these Accute Neuro-Alkaline Linguistics, or ANAL. Captain Heinous has left the lab...

posted by Captain Heinous @ 2/22/2005 07:33:00 AM 0 Comments

Thursday, February 17, 2005

Drunk ass motha fukka

Is a religious holy war the wet dream of evangelicals? How disappointed will they be after they've created a war (where there didn't need to be one) and ol' J.C. remains in the grave? Now we've picked on Syria (and again on Iran) while we've totally ignored the real threat of N. Korea. I'm no foreign policy wonk but it doesn't take PhD to know the Bush admin's head is up in Revelations Chapter 3 verse 4. (don't bother looking that up, I have no idea what it says).

I just heard a commercial from Dennis Miller. Is he the lamest character SNL ever spit out or what?

Idea: Thinking about what you don't have actually promulgates failure. Is the opposite true? Investigate.

Best scene from "Some Kind of Monster" when the punk rock bassist from Suicidal Tendencies gets 1 million dollars for playing bass better than anyone in the whole world. Metallica bite-a my weenie.

Do yourself a favor. Buy the Infectious Grooves CD (same bassist). Good shit. A crazy punk chick turned me on to it. She had nice boobies.

This was all inspired by a bottle of Cab Sav-een-yong, McMannis (only $10 a bot.) und velly goot.

Notice how it's hard to tell the psychotics talking to themselves on the street and people talking on their cell phones. I think that is a funny cosmic joke, that the evolutionary trend to use cell phones causes us to exhibit behavior akin to a mental deficiency. Ha ha. I laugh.

I had lunch at Fog City Diner and some dudes next to me were talkin' all NLP (Non linguistic programming). It was a way of life for them. They actually try to pick up women this way. If you don't know what that is (and if you're a woman you should), it's basically a fucked up psychological way for losers to get chicks. It's gay and when I say gay I don't mean homosexual, I mean GAY! This behavior threatens our species. Be men and get chicks the old fashion way with Rolex watches and Porsches. It may be base and shallow but at least it's honest.

posted by Howie Hardcore @ 2/17/2005 09:54:00 PM 0 Comments

Monday, February 14, 2005

Recap: erase: all rekkurd von: tranzz

SmaepPoboy: erase: all rekkurd von: tranzz
MVP_Ed_Jurak: say again?
SmaepPoboy: erase: all rekkurd von: tranzz
MVP_Ed_Jurak: i am drunk and half asleep, naen gerrmm
SmaepPoboy: erase: all rekkurd von: tranzz
MVP_Ed_Jurak: erase all records of transfers?
SmaepPoboy: erase: all rekkurd von: tranzz
MVP_Ed_Jurak: debbie downer: gmail sentt
SmaepPoboy: erase: all rekkurd von: tranzz
MVP_Ed_Jurak: i am: lost
SmaepPoboy: erase: all rekkurd von: tranzz
MVP_Ed_Jurak: send: viktor vaughn, traxx 6, 7, 8
SmaepPoboy: heyoooo!

posted by ApeRobot @ 2/14/2005 12:53:00 AM 0 Comments

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Camilla's Tampon

Today the papers tell us the Prince Charles is finally engaged to his true love, Camilla Parker Bowles. We're all happy for the Prince I'm sure and I'm reminded of that wonderful phrase uttered a decade ago where Prince Charles wished he could be reincarnated in the trousers of Camilla as her tampon. Well now it looks like he'll not have to wait. -Yummy!



posted by Howie Hardcore @ 2/10/2005 08:21:00 AM 0 Comments