And in other news...
Forget the impending nuclear war between India and Pakistan, there's a war or aesthetics going on as well between the two countries. In the annual Burn Your Enemy Leader competition both countries have shown that they've got what it takes to make the other side feel hated. Entries were judged in three categories: Mean chant culminating into inaudible blabbering, lighting of effigy technique, and the swinging effigy in crowd manuever. India scored strong in the first two categories but lost points when the flame from the effigy burnt through the flimsy rope holding it up causing the likeness to fall on the ground unviewable by the crowd. The India team tried to pick up the burning mass with their bare hands but they were just badly burned causing the judges to deduct further points. The Pakistan team showed that experience counts and their tried-and-true metal chain technique proved to be the clincher. Upon learning of their victory, the Pakistanis lit three more effigies those of Shaquille O'Neal, Kobe Bryant and Phil Jackson, chanting "the Lakers are the real terrorists!" The crowd then broke up into small games of pick-up basketball.
 |  |
| Pakistani Team | India Team |
