Emperor Ashcroft
Attorney General John Ashcroft has outraged Arab and immigration groups, by invoking a little used law that will allow the U.S. government to fingerprint, photograph and register as many as 100,000 visitors a year -- most of them Middle Eastern men. In an interview on "This Week" Ashcroft went on to explain that if these new measures did not contain the influx of terrorist that he would then employ a little used "Jedi Mind Trick". He then focused "Dark Side" energy towards This Week host, George Stephanopoulos, causing the host to double over, clutch his throat and gasp for air.
